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KARNAC and IFR have been teasing us all week with the upcoming “earth-shattering announcement” from Todd Hutto of East Bay Raceway. My sources have tipped me off to the possible forms that the announcement may take, so as a public service, here is a list of what we may hear.
Top 10 Possibilities for Todd Hutto’s Earth Shattering Announcement
To promote “fairness”, half of the racers payout will be seized from the winners, and it will be distributed to the teams that didn’t bring a car to race.
Sprint car wings will be replaced by solar panels.
Out with the beer stand…make way for Starbucks!
To reduce greenhouse gas emissions, all engines will be limited to 3000 RPM.
Late Model rules will be re-written to base the cars on a more “eco-friendly” format, like the hybrid Toyota Prius.
To eliminate bothersome passing and excess competition, East Bay is going to pave over the clay.
Like NASCAR, Todd plans to aggressively promote a diversity program for the drivers. So he will be adding a new class, “The Ghetto Donks”, for Caprices with 20” wheels, spinners and awesome stereos.
Also, he is adding a class aimed at Latino competitors, where it is assured that tech will find that “everyone is illegal”.
Rob Elting raced in a 4 cylinder exhibition race with Cece Brooks last week, and FINISHED ON THE LEAD LAP!
Gibsonton Meth Labs and Bail Bonds, Inc. announced as the title sponsor of the family section in the stands.
Top 10 Possibilities for Todd Hutto’s Earth Shattering Announcement
To promote “fairness”, half of the racers payout will be seized from the winners, and it will be distributed to the teams that didn’t bring a car to race.
Sprint car wings will be replaced by solar panels.
Out with the beer stand…make way for Starbucks!
To reduce greenhouse gas emissions, all engines will be limited to 3000 RPM.
Late Model rules will be re-written to base the cars on a more “eco-friendly” format, like the hybrid Toyota Prius.
To eliminate bothersome passing and excess competition, East Bay is going to pave over the clay.
Like NASCAR, Todd plans to aggressively promote a diversity program for the drivers. So he will be adding a new class, “The Ghetto Donks”, for Caprices with 20” wheels, spinners and awesome stereos.
Also, he is adding a class aimed at Latino competitors, where it is assured that tech will find that “everyone is illegal”.
Rob Elting raced in a 4 cylinder exhibition race with Cece Brooks last week, and FINISHED ON THE LEAD LAP!
Gibsonton Meth Labs and Bail Bonds, Inc. announced as the title sponsor of the family section in the stands.
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